A Parent’s Love

Last week I had another bad seizure. Since September that makes 3, plus however many lighter seizures thrown in. So I called my parents to keep them up-to-date. Mom and Dad were both sympathetic. I told them it’s just part of having dementia; my seizures happen more as my dementia gets worse. I was trying to be matter-of-fact. Then almost at the same time Dad said,” I’m sorry,” and Mom said, “I wish it was me instead of you.” Without thinking I said, “No you don’t; believe me you don’t want this.” I didn’t know what else to say. Besides we both have it rough; I have to live with dementia and they have to watch me live with dementia. Neither job is easy.

Anyway, I shared this conversation with Anita and she helped me understand what Mom and Dad were really saying. Anita explained that their words were a parent’s way of expressing their love and care; that they said what any loving parent would say in a situation like this. And Anita’s right. Mom’s and Dad’s words came from the heart.

It’s probably very clear to you, as you read this, but I needed the reminder. The obvious isn’t so obvious to me anymore. What loving parent would want to see one of their children go through this? And my parents have seen me go through a lot. So I get it now, I understand the message behind the words. So I will say now what I wish I would have said then, “Thank you Mom and Dad for your loving and caring words. They mean a lot to me.” (And thank you Anita for helping me to understand.)

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